Private Quarters

For me, my cancer diagnosis has always been a private matter. I shared it with mainly friends and family. Due to my wedding happening two months after the diagnosis, I probably shared it with more people than I felt necessary, but I didn't want someone attending the wedding to learn about my situation at the wedding. If you were close enough to me to be there, you deserved to know.

At the time of my diagnosis and first surgery, I shared my situation with very coworkers. A few months later, when it came time to begin chemo, I felt that those who worked closely me deserved to learn about my medical status. And luckily, many of my coworkers respected my privacy and didn't gossip. Many colleagues didn't even realize what was happening until it was over, until I stopped wearing my wig. Being almost bald is kind of a giveaway. And I think there are many who still don't know.

My reason for being quiet was because I never wanted to be defined by a few rogue cells that decided to take root and grow within my body. Once you tell people that you have cancer, the disease takes over your life. People begin to look at you differently. Conversations are awkward. I didn't want my life to be only about the cancer.

Today, NPR produced a piece about people who feel differently than me. In fact, one person is quoted as thinking that a television character who is private about having cancer is not believable character. "Turning Cancer, Other Diseases, Into Causes" discusses changes in society's attitude over the past few decades regarding sharing diagnoses and promoting disease awareness.

As I write this blog entry, I wonder if you might find me hypocritical for claiming privacy since I write a blog. My blog began as a way to share what was happening in my life with a few close friends so I wouldn't have to call everyone every time something new happened. As my medical adventures have began to die down, I've wondered if keeping the blog going was necessary. My psychologist encourages me to write a journal as a form of therapy, and this blog is my cancer journal.

And I keep my blog public, just in case someone out there, maybe recently diagnosed with breast cancer, worrying that they may be alone, possibly overwhelmed by a scary sea of rah-rah pink.

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High Hospital Fashion

If only my big 5-day post-surgical hospital stay were taking place a year later, my gown could have been a Diane Von Furstenberg (DVF) original. According to Newsweek, the Cleveland Clinic recently ended a trial period, which began in May, of high fashion hospital gowns designed by DVF and will implement them soon. Hopefully the gown will be more comfortable than ones I've worn for my hospital stays. Oddly, the gown looks nothing like a wrap dress.

For more details on the DVF hospital gown, including a photo, click here.

Six Easy Steps

Six Easy Steps to Getting Complements:

Step 1. Gain weight by eating whatever you want due to depression caused by a cancer diagnosis.
Step 2. Gain more weight by eating whatever you want under doctor's orders while undergoing chemo.
Step 3. Get bloated from steroids being pumped in to you system on a weekly basis due to chemo.
Step 4. Eventually lose the chemo steroid bloat.
Step 5. Have surgery which takes fat from your stomach and uses said fat to rebuild your breasts.
Step 6. Finally lose the weight you gained after your cancer diagnosis so you finally weigh what you did before the cancer diagnosis. (check the blog in a few days for a more serious post on how I actually lost my chemo weight)

Suddenly you will begin to receive all kinds of complements about how skinny you look, even if you weren't all that skinny before the cancer diagnosis.

So now you ask, "How should I respond to all of the complements on my weight loss?" Just smile and say thank you. We don't want to be sharing our secret, or do we?

Not so into sharing

According to a recent Wall Street Journal article, the Susan G. Komen For the Cure foundation will fight you if you want to use the term "for the cure." Komen also won't share the color pink. Gee if only it seemed like Komen did more than raise awareness of Komen, I might feel differently about their possessiveness. Komen won't share the phrase or the colors with other breast cancer organizations nor will they share with other cancer foundations and charities. In case you haven't read all of my posts, I'm not so into the pink brigade. I understand the issue from a business/branding angle, but you would think a charity would be a little more understanding. Than again, what do I know?

"Charity Brawl: Nonprofits Aren't So Generous When a Name's at Stake." Wall Street Journal, 8/5/2010. Accessed online on 8/5/2010: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748703700904575390950178142586.html?mod=WSJ_business_LeftSecondHighlights#articleTabs%3Darticle

P.S. I'm still recovering from my surgery so my brain is not totally functional otherwise I would probably have a lot more to say about this topic.