Full Support

Yesterday I wore a real bra for the first time since September 2008. Since the mastectomy, I have worn a mess of medical bras, light weight Gap sporty bras, prosthetics inside and outside bras, and nothing. The wearing of the bra was as uneventful as it should be.

Last week I went to Nordstrom's for a fitting. I chose Nordstrom for two reasons: customer service and their prosthetic program. Prior to my catching the cancer, my shopping experiences in department store lingerie departments had been less than comforting. Once when seeking a minimizing bra to fit into a special order bridesmaid dress, the sales lady loudly informed me that I could "just duct tape 'em, honey." At other stores, the sales clerks were nonexistent or uninformed. The only store that was ever helpful was Nordstrom's.

I was a bit hesitant about foisting my chopped-up torso onto an unsuspecting sales person, especially since the only people to have seen my winking smiley face (my nickname for my scars) have been my medical teams, my husband, and my mother. So while I got the go-ahead to wear bras from my surgeon a few months ago, I put it off. In my hunt for a nice lingerie store in the area, I discovered that Nordstrom's has a Prosthesis Program. I called ahead to explain my situation and was told I wouldn't need an appointment. So last Friday, I first went to a spa for a facial, and then to Nordstrom's for a bra fitting. The sales ladies were wonderful. They barely batted an eye; just went about grabbing different bras, whipping them on and off me until we found 3 that I liked. Their only concern was if I had healed from my surgeries.

If I could afford it, I don't know if I would shop anywhere else for bras ever again. I rarely leave a store feeling good about myself (a long boring story/rant about how clothing retailers don't make and/or sell  clothing for tall women and/or sell them in their stores), but I did on Friday. Thank you, Nordstrom's.

Turkey Time

Like an ominous and looming cloud, just like the ones in today's central Ohio sky, I knew this day was coming but it wasn't until noon-time that I realized today was the day. Last year, on the day before Thanksgiving, I had my first chemo session. Wow! I can't believe it has been one year.

During the fourth week of November, Americans typically like discuss thankfulness. In regards to chemo, there isn't much to be thankful. The experience sucks - there is really no other way to describe it. But if I had to say what I am thankful for in regards to chemo, I do have a few thoughts.

I am relieved that despite feeling nauseous at times, I never vomited. My wig wasn't horrible, and many people just assumed I had a slightly bad haircut (and some even complimented me on my new style). And I must recognize the the chemo nurses who made each chemo treatment session bearable, and sometimes, even slightly entertaining.

But in regards to true thankfulness, I am most thankful for my awesome husband, who I'm sure had his moments of frustration or anger, but never let me see them. I could not have survived those 5-months of chemo (or any of the many cancer-related surgeries, doctor's visits, psychological meltdowns, etc... throughout the entire cancer ordeal) without him and his unrelenting and unwavering support. Thank you. I love you.

As I not-so-fondly remember the chemo experience, I can smile and say, also thankfully, that the best part is now -- being finished, and have been finished for over six months. The port was removed last month. No more toxic chemicals flowing through my veins. Phew!


P.S. I can't forget to thank Betsy, who encouraged me to take way more naps than I probably needed. And Daisy, whose squeaks and antics will always make me laugh.